"Whoever made humanity will find no humanity here."

I finished reading The Road this past weekend and although it was slotted in for drama week, I really wanted to watch it sooner than later because it's so incredibly depressing that I was kind of dreading having to relive it again later in the summer. So, since we had some extra time yesterday I proposed squeezing it into this week. I think we are both glad to be done with it. The whole time I was reading it I could not fathom why anyone would think this would make a good movie. It is an intensely horrific and draining story, and the movie was no different. Of course it was well done, but it still made me want to kill myself. It was perfectly bleak and for the most part was pretty true to the book. The whole thing hinged on the performance of the boy, because he was the emotional center of the story, and the young actor was very good. We managed to hold off crying till the very end, but felt a lingering sadness for a while after. I found myself sympathising with the mom, in that I don't think I could struggle that hard for a life that isn't much of a life at all. Quality of life is more important to me than just being alive, and although I am not a mother myself I could completely understand why she couldn't stand by and watch her child suffer like that.

As opposed to my pessimistic views, Brandon found the book and film less depressing and more hopeful than Cormac McCarthy's last story that was adapted to the screen, No Country for Old Men. He saw The Road as a metaphor for life and the value in struggle, whereas in No Country, struggle never trumps fate. Interesting that a man changes his views so quickly in one year's time.

I would recommend reading the book before watching the movie. The book is far more moving.

"How do you explain midgets or sock monkeys? I don't know!"

One thing I forgot to mention Sunday night when I was plowing through all those reviews from the weekend is how easily swayed I am by a movie simply by spying people I like in the cast. As much as I disliked her character, I was excited when I saw Caroline from The Vampire Diaries (with red hair!) in Deadgirl. The few precious moments Chris Pratt showed up in Jennifer's Body made me melt. So, even though S. Darko was not a great movie or even a good movie, I was so thoroughly thrilled to see it populated by actors I like that I didn't have a problem with it. First and foremost I enjoy Daveigh Chase and have loved her in every single thing I have seen her do, so she was a no brainer. Next, there's Chuck Bass (second time he's popped up during our 100 Movies) from Gossip Girl. He's nothing special but... he's Chuck Bass! Oh, hello there John Hawkes, AKA Sol Star from Deadwood (not to mention Eastbound & Down and Lost)! So nice to see you. Then, my darling dearest Nate from One Tree Hill came onscreen and I just about lost my little mind. I truly adore him, and had a good time watching him try out a nice meaty role as a messed up Iraq vet. I had just recovered from the thrill of Nate when BOOM - is that freaking Jasper from Twilight??? Damn, he's so adorable without that awful Jasper wig! Oh, dear, is that Elizabeth Berkley as a possibly insane Bible banger? Um, yes, it is, and it looks like the Bible's not the only thing she's banging - it's Alaric from The Vampire Diaries!!

Anyway, going into this movie we knew that the creator of Donnie Darko had zero involvement, and that it had gotten horrible reviews, so our expectations were lower than low. It wasn't that awful - it just didn't really go anywhere, nor did it do any kind of mind expansion the way its predecessor did. It seemed like it was trying to pull in lots of aspects of the original without adding anything new or interesting. I was especially put off by the mirroring of the [spoiler] preacher man who everyone admired as probably being the serial child kidnapper/torturer [/spoiler]. That storyline was really half assed and like the rest of the movie, never really explored any new terrain. We're glad we saw it but won't exactly recommend it.

"Of course she's roughin up the handicapped, but who's countin?"

Brandon rented Ink on the recommendation of a friend and because he was intrigued by the backstory - made for $250k and the most downloaded thing on the internet for a few weeks or something like that. It was a very odd movie, involving topics that interest us both, such as how dreams affect life, how life affects dreams, how our choices in life affect the people around us and our futures.

We totally forgot why we had rented it while we were watching, so we were kind of weirded out by the whole tone. It's very amateurish and almost feels like a student film or maybe a play that was turned into a movie or something. Which is not to say that it was bad at all - it was very well done for what it was. The effects were interesting, and although the story wasn't all that tight and left quite a bit hanging, it still kept our attention. It was quite clear that the actors were not really pros, but they were still effective and emotionally connected. I especially enjoyed Jacob, the pathfinder. He was fun and had some great facial expressions. Overall, enjoyable but not all that memorable.

"Sometimes monsters hunt you."

We attempted to finish out horror week with a movie from the 80's starring a very young Jennifer Connely called Phenomena, by director Dario Argento. Brandon has been wanting to see some of his movies for a while, so he thought we would give it a try. This movie inspired the second new rule of the week (after Saturday's "movies in the theater count" rule), known as the Bail Out rule. After 20 minutes I knew I was going to hate it because it was just super annoying, and was so thankful when Brandon said, "Ok, I don't think we can handle this one...time to bail!" It was just so boring and blah, and the weird overdubbing of the dialog for the Italian actors was incredibly distracting.

So, we slotted in Wolfman instead. We agreed it was pretty much what we expected - classic horror style, good cast, good effects. The pacing was a bit slow for me, but overall we enjoyed it. I wasn't expecting the Anthony Hopkins character to turn out to be so creepy, which is something he does quite well, so that was fun. Although it wasn't originally included in horror week, we were very glad we had it on hand to pinch hit! Not quite a home run, but a solid line drive double.

This week is going to be rough if I end up getting on the jury, because I have a project due Friday at work so if I spend all day every day in court through Wednesday I will be spending all evening those days working. We shall see how it goes, but we have sci-fi week on tap to begin Monday! Wish us luck.

"Overkill is underrated, my friend."

Upon planning our first actual theater outing during the 100 Movies of Summer, Brandon decreed that these movies will also count! YAY! So, we get to include The A-Team in our list.

We both completely, unabashedly, unapologetically loved this movie. As fans of the series, we're really confused as to what any of the critics who gave it bad reviews were expecting. This movie is so much fun, with a good script, great dialog, fun cast, and lots of rock em sock em action. One of my very favorite things is cleverly choreographed violence and action, which this movie delivers in spades. I have the reaction of laughing hysterically and bouncing in my seat when action sequences tickle me, so I barely sat still throughout. As for the cast, all of the guys did their predecessors proud, but I particularly loved Sharlto Copley as Murdock. That guy is hilarious and so very watchable. We are so glad that Maddie and Chris agreed to watch this one with us -we had a great time!

"I know something really wrong is happening here, but is there any chance we can just ignore it?"

Now, THIS is the tone that Drag Me to Hell wishes it had gotten all the way through. Vampire Killers (aka Lesbian Vampire Killers) is my first official "good" choice through this whole process. Brandon only slotted it into horror week because it was one of the few movies we have gotten in recent weeks that I had any say in, but it was really more of a comedy. I picked it because the two main characters are played by James Corden and Mathew Horne, who are also the stars of a show I love on BBC America, Gavin and Stacey. This movie is stupid, ridiculous, goofy, lame, and all around fun. James Corden is just hilarious to me (sort of on par with Zach Galifianakis, wherein every word out of his mouth makes me laugh), and he did not disappoint. I was so glad that Brandon found the guys as appealing as I do, and that I finally redeemed myself in the movie picking. The gore is super cartoonish (instead of bursting into flames or blood when killed, the lesbian vampires squirt very suggestive white goo) but the humor is excellent British nuttiness, in the vein of Hot Fuzz or Shaun of the Dead.

"Just don't tell my grandma, ok?"

If you like twisted horror, Deadgirl is for you. There's really no way to discuss the plot without giving away the entire story, but it is a very interesting character piece as well as a disturbing zombie-ish horror. The two main characters seem harmless enough, and the plunge they take into showing their true colors as completely irredeemable psychopaths is riveting. The titular dead girl is so, so very creepy. The only aspect of this unique story that I found a bit tired was the old "loser boy loves popular girl who is supposedly nice even though she dates the biggest asshole in school." No sweet, popular girl who is dating the scumbag jock actually helps out the nerd that the jock is actively picking on and then continues to date him. Why not just make her a straight up bitch? Why try to pretend she's nice? The main character can still have a crush on a bitchy girl. It won't make a bit of difference, except that maybe we would feel a bit less sympathy for what happens to her in the end, but no one deserves that anyway so I think it would be fine. That cliche always bugs me so I was disappointed that they went that route on the love interest here. Other than that it was a pretty tight plot. I am almost hesitant to say we liked this movie because it's so gross and awful, but we really did. I kind of wish we had watched this first and then Jennifer's Body so as to cleanse the palate a bit, though. This was a rough one to go to bed after watching.

As a side note, about an hour into this, I admitted to Brandon that the main character reminded me so much of a young Joaquin Phoenix, and he yelled, "I KNOW!! He totally does!! But also... the other guy... young Andy Samberg?" TOTALLY!!! LOL! It was a nice light moment for us in an otherwise intensely dark movie.

"She's just staring out the window like a zombie, mannequin, robot, statue!"

Unlike most critics, Brandon and I enjoyed Jennifer's Body quite a lot. Neither of us is a Megan Fox fan by any means, but we thought she did a good job in this role. We ARE big Amanda Seyfried fans, so of course we thought she was great. The story was interesting enough, the pace was snappy, the dialog was funny. The highlight for me was Adam Brody as the evil douchebag lead singer of a totally douchetastic indie band. He played that part so very well, which was really funny considering it was the antithesis of the nerdy cool role that brought him the most fame. Good movie - not great, but fun.

"I beat you, you old bitch!"

I think I am officially banned from picking movies. I wanted to see Drag Me to Hell the minute I saw the trailer, but B resisted, so as soon as it came out on DVD I demanded that we get it. He put it in horror week for me, and now regrets doing so. What a load. This should have been my perfect movie: Sam Raimi, Justin Long, gypsy curses, evil spirits, possession... everything I love! And yet... and yet. So, so bad. There were a few moments where I literally jumped and gasped, but they were all just those "loud noise/creepy image in your face" type scares. Mostly we just laughed at how freaking lame it was. When Christine saw the old lady's car waiting for her, why didn't she turn back around and get security? The entire situation could have been easily avoided in that one moment. Then the attack sequence with he old lady... ugh. I kept yelling that this had to be a dream, what with the [spoiler] stapling of the eye, the stapler down the throat, the jagged dentures, the chomping on her face, the fact that she decided to RAM INTO OTHER CARS INSTEAD OF JUST RUNNING AWAY!!!! Please. Please. Just... ugh. And then Justin Long saying the police would "talk to" the old lady so she would leave Christine alone? OH, HELLZ TO THA NO. Why was she not pressing charges???? [/spoiler] As I said before, I will suspend my disbelief for just about anyone with a two bit story and a dream in his heart, but this was ghastly, and not in the good way horror movies should be. When the [spoiler] goat [/spoiler] started talking it was all I could do not to leave the room. Such a disappointment.

"Did I hear that code red or am I losing my shit?"

Eeeeeeeeeee horror week has officially begun! 28 Weeks Later is unequivocally horrific, gross, violent, bloody, creepy, and awesome. If you've seen and enjoyed 28 Days Later, or if you just like zombie-esque stories, this movie is for you. I honestly can't say too much without giving anything away, because as with any good horror movie the best moments are the shocking ones. Robert Carlyle was excellent as always. I had a funny moment when Rose Byrne's character was introduced talking but we couldn't see her face yet during which "Supertight" by Jackie Q (her character in Get Him to the Greek) started playing in my head, so I started cracking up when I realized it was actually her. However, I found her a bit off in this movie. She was kind of... sluggish, or something. Not that she's normally a super spaz, and I understand that her character is quite beat down by the time we meet her, but her lethargy and weirdly deliberate way of speaking were off putting. On the other hand, I think Brandon may be developing a new man crush on Jeremy Renner. We have yet to see The Hurt Locker (war week!!) but we were big fans of his short lived abc series, The Unusuals, so we were excited to see him here.

I did spend some time yelling at the tv because the kids who are basically the catalyst for the catastrophe are RIDICULOUSLY idiotic. I will just put this whole rant in spoiler tags so as not to ruin anything. [spoiler] OMFG, if I had gone through the horrors of the initial outbreak, I would never in a million years attempt to go out into the forbidden areas! I was so angry that these kids, who had been separated from their parents, whose mother had supposedly been killed by the infected people, who are finally attempting to get back to some semblance of normalcy would so cavalierly wander off into a dangerous situation like that. The boy was obviously suffering from PTSD, but he would quickly agree to go to their old home so he could get a damn picture THE NEXT DAY?? I had a reallllllllllllllly really hard time swallowing that garbage. Yes, I understand this needed to happen in order to ignite the virus again, but it could have at least been a couple weeks later or something. So annoying. I was pissed at those kids through the whole thing, especially since they were pretty much the only characters who survived. Ugh. [/spoiler] In spite of that, I really did enjoy it, as did Brandon.

"She could suck the gay right off a painting of a unicorn."

The transition from comedy week to horror week was perfect, in that The Haunted World of El Superbeasto was much more of a comedy than horror. This animated movie directed by Rob Zombie certainly contains horror elements, with lots of blood, monsters, Nazi werewolves and zombies [spoiler] the former made us gasp and giggle as we had JUST finished watching True Blood with the Nazi werewolves [/spoiler], and a Satanic doctor, but it was more silly than scary. Much to Brandon's chagrin, it was also a bit of a musical, with hilarious songs provided by comedy musicians Hard N' Phirm. For me, however, this was the highlight, because the lead singer of this group is one of the loves of my life, Chris Hardwick. He can pretty much do no wrong in my eyes, and these songs were just ridiculously funny. What kept Brandon from bailing out on the musical aspect was the abundance of cartoon boobies. He enjoyed Suzi X especially, and I was a big fan of her horny robot sidekick. Rosario Dawson was great as a foul mouthed (and just plain foul) stripper. I would say this was one of my faves we have watched.

Next up is 28 Weeks Later, which I KNOW for sure is horror. I think...

"You wanna end up like Retardo Montelban here?"

Weirdsville was pretty comedic, but I think this week has made me reevaluate what I consider a comedy. I think Some Like It Hot was really the only actual comedy we have watched. This movie is pretty funny and employs one of those "what more can happen to these losers" type stories. I have always liked Scott Speedman, so he was enjoyable for me, and midgets in medieval costumes kicking ass are always fun. Not much else to say about it - it wasn't exactly predictable, but at times I just felt like the weirdness was tossed in for the sake of being weird. Although the visual of [spoiler] Max Headroom getting a huge icicle lodged into the top of his head was pretty awesome [/spoiler], I was mostly kind of bored. Brandon, on the other hand, said he really enjoyed it. He thought the tone was completely strange - like, how are we supposed to care about a bunch of junkie thieves - but he kind of liked the fact that it worked counter to the usual expectations of sympathetic heroes.

"Swear on your left gonad..."

I wanted to like Baghead so much. Mark Duplass, who is is in one of my favorite shows, The League, as well as the star of Humpday from earlier this week, wrote and directed it with his brother. Since I love the humor in both of those projects, and Brandon claimed this was a comedy, I assumed it would be great. Not so much. Maybe we just weren't in the mood, maybe we expected too much, but this was boring and not even a little bit funny. All it did was make me want to go to the mountain home again and write a movie with my friends. Brandon said, "So, I guess this would be the first terrible one, huh?" Shhh... I think we made him forget American Dreamz.

"Story of my life. I always get the fuzzy end of the lollipop."

I'm not sure why we don't watch more old movies because we always love them. Some Like It Hot is in the AFI top 100 and it's clear why. We laughed the entire time because it was so adorably charming. I don't think I had ever seen a whole Marilyn Monroe movie before, but this made me want to rent more. We weren't aware of all the behind the scenes drama associated with this one until I looked it up afterward, and both of us agree that we would never have guessed it based on her performance. If she was that wonderful when her life was in shambles, just imagine how good she could have been if she'd been able to get her act together. Such a shame.

Ok, back to the movie itself. As with The Godfather, one of my favorite things about watching old movies like this is seeing how handsome and debonair the actors I have only known as old men used to be. I think I would have been terribly in love with Jack Lemmon if I had been around during his heyday. Both he and Tony Curtis were a blast to watch, and were completely committed to the physical humor. It's easy for a man to get laughs disguised as a woman, but these guys brought a lot of depth to the comedy without always going solely for the cheap laugh. So much fun. I loved the wardrobe for the entire cast, especially Monroe's dresses. Where do I find sexy outfits I need to be sewn into like those?? I want some! I also really enjoyed the music and the sets, including the gorgeous Del Coronado hotel, where Brandon and I were lucky enough to stay a few years ago.

The only negative side effect of this movie for me is that I can't stop singing "I Wanna Be Loved By You" and talking like Sugar, but Brandon seems to enjoy both, so it's all good.

This weekend we should be able to squeeze in more than two movies so hopefully we'll get a jump on things. At the very least, Baghead and Weirdsville will round out comedy week.

"You don't have to have a fuckin' hard-on to bungee jump."

This theme week thing is just as questionable as I suspected it would be. When you haven't seen a movie yet and you just go by a description to put it in a category, sometimes you're going to get it wrong. I guess you could call Humpday a very dark comedy, but that would be pushing it. Based on the subject matter of two old friends (both straight males) who decide to have sex with each other on camera in the name of art, Brandon thought it was going to be some kind of slapstick farce. Not so much. This is not to say we didn't like it. We were both really impressed by the script, especially the authentic dialog, a lot of which seemed to be improvised and was very natural. Brandon was particularly struck by the chemistry and interaction between Ben, and his wife Anna. They felt very much like a real married couple as opposed to a typical "movie" married couple. This movie is extremely talky but I really liked all of the topics that were discussed because I find the idea of rebelling against your nature and/or the image you portray to be fascinating.

In one of the scenes between Ben and Andrew, they both come to a realization and try to convince each other that they are not so easily shoved into neat little "picket fence" v. "Kerouac" boxes. That hit me particularly hard, as I've really been struggling with this sort of thing a lot lately. Why do we have to fit into these small, uber-defined roles that certain aspects of our personalities dictate? Why can't we all be multi-faceted and have 10 different kinds of friends and enjoy them all equally? Why does the way someone looks have to predicate their behavior? Why do so many of us allow society to outline the type of person we're supposed to be based on one or two surface level pieces of ourselves? Ben and Andrew have to come to terms with the fact that everyone really does live in the gray zone, no matter how badly society wants to force us to be black and white. I loved the scene where [spoiler] Andrew showed up to have sex with the woman he met in the coffee shop and was totally weirded out by the fact that she wanted her girlfriend and all of her "hardware" to be involved. Despite always believing that he was open minded and above the "square" mentality, he practically ran out of there because he was so uncomfortable. [/spoiler] I think everyone can relate to that moment in life when you are confronted with the fact that maybe you're not exactly the person you thought you were. What does a person do with that information? How do you move forward? Do you allow yourself to be whoever it is you really are, or do you try to force yourself back into that slot that's been designated for you, whether it be self imposed or societally influenced?

Who knows if the creators of this movie really intended it to be funny or a serious commentary, but I got a lot out of it and we both thought it was a very good movie.

"Does it bother you that people call you Shorty?" "Does it bother you that people call you Retard?"

We were able to borrow Casey's beloved copy of Zodiac and get this one finished up before moving on to our next comedy.

As with any fact based story, the suspense of Zodiac was ratcheted up by the fact that this is something that really happened. Every time the title card would flash a "six months later" or even a "five years later" we would be shocked that this case went on and on for so long, and seemed like such a mess. So much circumstantial evidence in so many directions?? I found myself becoming so frustrated every time I thought they had solved the case and then it just fizzled out. There was a lot of great tension and there are tons of good performances by a cast packed with familiar faces.

While other people may focus on Mark Ruffalo (I know he makes some people craaaaaazy), I really enjoyed Jake Gyllenhaal in this. I generally think he's a good actor, but he's never the principal draw for me. However, I was totally drawn in by his gradual decent into obsession and the way he morphed from sweet, hapless cartoonist into this hardened, determined man on a mission.

Brandon came away surprised that this film was overlooked when it came to the Oscars, because it was very well put together as far as the other elements besides the aforementioned acting - the sets, wardrobe, and script were all top notch.

"If we don't tell people how we feel, what are we doing here?"

Apparently Brandon thought Women in Trouble was going to be a chick flick, and was pleasantly surprised that it was not. It was pretty raunchy and fun to watch, and in his words, "The racks were great." As soon as I saw the opening credits roll, I knew exactly why he had rented it based on two little words: Carla Gugino. She's one of our mutual favorites and we have followed her into many a crappy movie and tv show. This wasn't a great movie, but we have certainly suffered through far worse for her. The woman is 40 and still super hot and so enjoyable to watch. We were impressed by the whole cast, especially Adrianne Palicki as a dimwitted but adorable up and coming porn star. Her touching monologue about her childhood pet had us riveted. (Yea, if you've seen it you know what's up.) I am a sucker for movies with interwoven stories, and when those stories toss together porn stars, psychologists, hookers, cheaters, rock stars, and secret moms, it's hard for me not to have a good time.

Special notes: Anyone who may be interested in seeing it because of Joseph Gordon-Levitt should be sure stick around till after the credits, because despite his top billing, he doesn't show up until then. Anyone who has actually already seen this movie and liked it should keep an eye out for the sequel, Elektra Luxx, which apparently co-stars my man Timothy Olyphant. I'll be making sure B puts that on our list!

Tomorrow night I will be busy at a SYTYCD watching event, but I think the next movie on the list is Humpday.

"This is gonna be a total clustercuss."

Ok, so here's the deal. Brandon decided to do a bunch of theme weeks, starting yesterday. Yes, he's changing how the weeks are laid out, and comedy week now starts with Son of Rambow. It continued tonight with The Fantastic Mr. Fox. I am pretty glad he made the switch because it really was fantastic. We both loved it. He wanted to see it in the theater when it first came out because he's completely gay for Clooney, but I was hesitant because the animation kind of creeped me out. I could not have been more wrong. The animation was actually lovely, especially the backgrounds. The entire cast was stellar, especially Jason Schwartzman, but when is he ever not stellar? There's not much else to say except that if you haven't seen it you really should.

So, here's the schedule going forward, into the first week of August. I hope certain people find some of the choices appealing. ;o)

Comedy Week: 6.13 – 6.19

• Son of Rambow
• Fantastic Mr. Fox
• Women in Trouble
• Humpday
• Some Like it Hot
• Baghead
• Weirdsville

Horror Week: 6.20 – 6.26

• The Haunted World of El Superbeasto
• 28 Weeks Later
• Drag Me to Hell
• Deadgirl
• Jennifer's Body
• Vampire Killers
• Phenomena

Sci-Fi Week: 6.27 – 7.3

• Ink
• S. Darko: A Donnie Darko Tale
• Children of Men
• Moon
• Brazil
• Southland Tales
• A Scanner Darkly

Cops and Detectives Week: 7.4 – 7.10

• Bullitt
• The French Connection
• Gone Baby Gone
• Brown's Requiem
• Surveillance
• Dark Passage
• Trans Siberian

Documentary / Historic Week: 7.11 – 7.17

• Jesus Camp
• Crazy Love
• The Devil and Daniel Johnston
• Grizzly Man
• Elizabeth
• Elizabeth: The Golden Age
• Frost/Nixon

Drama Week: 7.18 – 7.24

• Crazy Heart
• Ask the Dust
• A Serious Man
• Gran Torino
• Revolutionary Road
• Brick
• The Go-Getter

Spy / War Week: 7.25 – 7.31

• A Few Days in September
• 3 Days of the Condor
• Fay Grim
• The Good German
• The Hurt Locker
• The Deer Hunter
• Letters From Iwo Jima

Gun Thugs Week: 8.1 – 8.7

• On the Waterfront
• Get Carter
• I'll Sleep When I'm Dead
• Edmond
• City of God
• Before the Devil Knows You're Dead
• Bonnie and Clyde

"This has been my best day of all time."

After being gone all day Saturday, we originally planned to at least watch two Sunday. Unfortunately, the Zodiac disc was screwed up and froze about an hour into it, so we will have to finish that one another day. So, technically we didn't get the full 7 movies this week. Oh, well - we will catch up!

The movie we did watch Sunday was Son of Rambow. I think this has been my favorite one so far. The main character was adorable, but I thought Will Poulter (Lee Carter) stole the movie. I will keep an eye out for that kid in other movies, for sure. He is so watchable and has that self-possessed thing a lot of British child actors have that I absolutely love. This was a very sweet movie, which we really needed after the string of difficult ones we have been watching. We found the the comedy in the stunts the kids pulled off while attempting to make the movie and drama provided by the glimpses into their seemingly opposite but similarly difficult family lives equally compelling.

This week's picks will hopefully be a bit lighter than last week's! B decided he wants to do some kind of "theme" weeks. He seems to think this will be "comedy" week, which should tell you a little bit about the mindset in our household. ;o)

• Weirdsville
• Baghead
• Some Like it Hot
• Humpday
• Women in Trouble
• Fantastic Mr. Fox

Edited to add: I totally jumped the gun on this. We still have Jesus Camp tonight. Oops! I felt so behind that I wanted to get those four posted and move forward. Oh, well, now we're ahead.

"If you took the time now to bother to stuff a collapsible shoulder-launch RPG up somebody's bunghole, don't you think you'd fire it?"

As soon as I saw that the full title of this movie is Smokin Aces 2: Assassin's Ball I giggled to Bigs, "Is it gonna turn into a Ballroom Blitz??" thinking I was so clever. Then they used the song in the movie, and we soon realized that was the highest level of wit that would be employed throughout. This being a straight to dvd movie, our expectations were not high, and they were absolutely met. It was a funny shoot em up with some GREAT visuals like [spoiler] a midget being shot out of a cannon used as a bomb [/spoiler], but it was mostly forgettable. The story was very predictable and a lot of the action was over the top without being all that creative. The highlight for me was Summer Reeser as a badass. She's another one of those actresses that I just find mesmerizing and can't quite explain why. Seeing her as a totally whackjob gun nut was quite fun for me.

"My name is Dito... and I'm gonna leave everybody in this film."

After the mindfuck of Synecdoche, I was ready for a straightforward drama. Boy, did I get one with A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints. This was quite a raw and difficult movie to watch, but we both agreed it was very good. I am a big Shia fan from the Even Stevens days, and the kid can pretty much do no wrong in my eyes. Despite his foray into the big action movies, I still stand by my initial belief that he is a great dramatic actor, and this movie was a perfect example. The whole setup of the movie is from the perspective of the writer, telling the story of his formative years and then the backlash later. The dialog is done in a very realistic, almost improvisational way, so it felt like more of a documentary, which I enjoyed. Overall we were very impressed with the casting of the child/adult versions of the characters and thought the story was moving.

"The end is built into the beginning."

Unfortunately, Brandon spend the bulk of Wednesday night at the pet hospital sitting with our kitty Petra as she recovered from surgery (she's doing good now), and then Thursday night we spent the evening watching the Laker game with some friends. So, we spent the day at home Friday taking care of Petra and decided to have a triple feature! Here's the first one we watched that day.

Watching Synecdoche, New York after watching Revolver was a very interesting juxtaposition. It kind of hurt my head like Revolver did, but I really wanted to understand this one, while I just wanted to get far away from Revolver. The premise isn't simple, the characters aren't exactly relatable or easy to understand, the pacing is odd and time doesn't seem to flow in any discernible way, and yet I was drawn in. Brandon had the opposite reaction and was repelled by all the things that kept me interested. As I mentioned when discussing Revolver, I love weird and this was a much more comforting type of weird for me. I felt like some of the really awful things that happened were throw in for shock value, such as [spoiler] the revelation that Olive was basically abused and brain washed by her mother's friend before she died of some awful disease [/spoiler] but mostly I enjoyed the off-kilter, not quite believable world that was created. My "suspension of disbelief" switch is easily flipped, so getting into that mindset wasn't difficult for me. Once you have established a bizarre world, as long as you follow the rules you have set up for it I am willing to follow you pretty much anywhere. I think this movie was able to do that, and although it was pretty depressing it was still an interesting character study, even if the characters weren't realistic.

"You got more tricks than a clown's pocket"

Brandon has serious man-love for Jason Statham, and we both like Guy Ritchie films in general, so we had some high hopes for Revolver, even though B warned me it was going to be weird. Understatement of the freakin millennium. I still have no idea wtf happened. Don't get me wrong - I love weird. I gravitate towards weird. I normally eat it up with a spoon. However, "weird" doesn't have to mean "complete clusterfuck." Mostly I was just bored. There was so much going on that I couldn't focus very well and kept zoning out. My feelings echo the Rotten Tomatoes consensus: "In attempting to meld his successful previous formulas with philosophical musings, Guy Ritchie has produced an incoherent misfire." I just could not connect on any level.

Brandon thinks I was not in the right frame of mind because I wasn't expecting that sort of thing from Ritchie so it took me off guard. He said he liked it, but is not sure what he saw, "and I don't think I am upset by that." He can see why people hated it, but he found it intriguing in the same way he finds David Lynch movies. I agree with his point that in general most people hate Guy Ritchie for one reason or another, but if Lynch's name were on that movie they would have loved it. He thought it was an interesting descent into madness and enjoyed the fact that the [spoiler] question of what was real and what was not was never answered. [/spoiler] Overall, he didn't love it or hate it but was intrigued by it.

The only thing we really agreed on about it was the cast. We both loved Andre 3000 in it (is that guy EVER not super charming??), Statham was as good as ever, and Ray Liotta was a bit over the top as he always is.

Tonight: Synecdoche, New York. This one should be eccentric but in a much more Jen-friendly way.

"Allegedly."

As I mentioned previously, the motivating factor in watching Feast was that I was a big fan of Project Greenlight. I knew it would be pretty crappy, since I watched it being made, and some of the funnier moments were familiar to me. Overall we both thought it was fun and well done for what it was. When a movie does the unexpected right away, like [spoiler] killing off McSteamy after he's been on screen for two minutes, and immediately ripping off Jason Mewes's face [/spoiler], it's got my attention and I am willing to give it a chance. Brandon was quite pleased to see Jenny Wade, his favorite demon from Reaper (especially in her bra) while I indulged my latent Balthazar Getty fetish (don't judge - I will always have lingering affection from when I was 16 and had pics of him plastered on my notebook). The effects were cartoonish but I did get a bit squeamish at times. I mean, [spoiler] did that creature really jizz in Harley Mom's mouth??? [/spoiler] Just sayin. Henry Rollins was delightful as a motivational speaker, but Navi Rawat was just plain bad. I fuzzily recall that the director was not cool with her being cast, and I can completely understand why. We used to watch Numbers and always thought she was cute and sweet, but she was so wooden and annoying here.

Ok, fine, it was a rough night, but we did it! Seven movies down. We will slide Jesus Camp into this week's agenda. The tentative list for week two is as follows:

• Revolver
• Synecdoche, New York
• Guide to Recognizing Your Saints
• Smokin' Aces 2
• Son of Rambow
• Zodiac
• Jesus Camp

We're doing well, but I am already kind of bummed about being behind on tv. The Nurse Jackie and Tara finales are sitting on the dvr taunting me right now (we ALWAYS watch those shows the night of) so I hope we're able to watch them tonight in addition to our movie.

"Martin, I'm not physically attracted to other people, but if you want me, I'm yours."

Last minute substitution! We were both so tired and not really all there when we got home last night, so as I flipped through the case of movies I grabbed the first thing that caught my eye that I wanted to see: American Dreamz.

The whole time we were watching this movie, Brandon laughed and was engaged. He has a soft spot for Mandy Moore, so I figured he would at least like it a bit. As an American Idol fan, I was tickled by the story and Hugh Grant was great as a mash-up of Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest. We both cracked up at Chris Klein's singing, especially now that we have seen his incredible Mama Mia audition. However, as soon as it ended the first words out of his mouth were, "I blame you for this one!" Blame me for what? A silly, entertaining little movie? He said it was a wretched piece of shit and didn't enjoy it at all. Ok... so, the laughter was because...? "Because I was laughing AT how craptastic it was!" Recorded.

"Never hate your enemies. It affects your judgement."

After a pretty packed weekend, we soldiered on through watching Godfather III last night. At times we struggled to stay awake but we just grabbed sodas, sat up, and pushed till the end.

I wanted to keep an open mind, really I did, but wow - this movie blew. Just as bad as everyone I spoke to about it claimed. Brian was saying that it was just dirty or something, and I think a better descriptor would be coarse. It didn't have any of the subtlety or class of the other two. I didn't like the way they spoke so plainly about everything, rather than keeping the distasteful things more hush hush and tactful as in the first two.

I found the overall story pretty boring. I thought I would be into all the Vatican stuff as I generally am drawn to religious topics, but that was a snooze, too. The old age makeup was laughably pathetic. And I know it's a dead horse that's been pounded into the ground at this point but wowwwwwwwwww Sofia Coppola was intensely awful. I couldn't believe it. I had hoped that maybe it was just something people made a big deal about but would turn out to be not so bad. It was SO, so bad. I felt so sad and embarrassed for her the whole time. Aside from her acting abilities (or lack thereof) her storyline was cringe worthy as well. Brandon kept trying to argue with me at first when I was yelling, [spoiler] "Ewwwww they are cousinnnnnns!! STOP IT!!" and said he didn't think they were actually related, but just called each other cousins. No, dude, they specifically said he was Sonny's boy. COUSINS!!!! ACK! So gross. Michael's totally blasé reaction to it at first weirded me out, too. I expected him to kill Vincent on the spot. [/spoiler]

I also really, really did not like Diane Keaton in any of these movies. Not that I am a huge fan of hers to begin with, but in this trilogy in particular she was just shrill and obnoxious. She and Pacino had zero chemistry to me, so I couldn't understand their relationship at all.

Another thing that bugged me personally was the criminally brief and useless appearance of Bridget Fonda. I got so excited when she appeared on screen, because I have adored her since the moment I saw her many years ago, but she was completely wasted here. Such a bummer.

Brandon said that overall he doesn't really think the movies were that great, individually or as a whole. He loves detective stories and a large portion of these movies dealt with the internal "political" intrigue, but they only show you the conclusions of those situations (with the formulaic murder montages) rather than explaining how he figured out who did what and how/why. He said Coppola just tried to do too much and didn't really succeed.

Ok, tonight we attempt Feast and maybe Jesus Camp, maybe something easier. We'll see how it goes!

"Just enough to wet my beak."

This was two discs, so we split Godfather II up and watched it Friday and Saturday. It put us a bit behind, but that's fine! We will attempt two movies tonight.

As expected based on what people have told me about it, I enjoyed this way more than part I. Brandon said he liked them both about the same. He was really impressed with both Robert DeNiro and Al Pacino's performances. We forget that these men were great, subdued actors before they became caricatures of themselves, and this movie really showcases their talents. What I liked best was the way this was actually a prequel and a sequel at the same time. Seeing Vito's childhood traumas and how he pulled himself up from literally nothing was much more interesting to me than the more current mafia stuff. On the flip side, Brandon didn't think that device worked very well. He said would have preferred an entire movie devoted to Vito's early life, and that DeNiro was the highlight of the whole trilogy for him.

Next up: Godfather III.

"Leave the gun. Take the cannoli."

The Godfather

It would be silly of us to try to give any kind of comprehensive review of this behemoth in a quick blog posting, so I will just give an overview of our impressions.

We both liked it a lot and are looking very forward to part two, which people have been telling us is even better. Brandon was really struck by the fact that there's no way a movie like this could be made today, in that no audience or studio would have the patience to allow so much development and long scenes of mostly dialog. He particularly cited the entire beginning wedding sequence that went on for a good half hour or so, which seemed incredibly long by today's standards but was so very important in establishing the entire tone and theme of the importance of family as well as "family." He also was intrigued by the way that the movie was set in the 40s/50s but had such a 70s feel to it. It was a bit strange to him, but he liked the vibe.

What I enjoyed most was seeing all of these actors that I always think of as older men in their prime. James Caan was so handsome! I couldn't get over it. I haven't seen much of Al Pacino's early work either, so I was very taken with him as a young man. Quite mesmerizing!

Hopefully tonight we will have the time/strength to at least start Godfather II. We have some errands to run and stuff to do around the house, but I think we can at fit in a couple hours and then maybe finish it up Saturday.

"The eyes are the nipples of the face."

The House Bunny

We had the time to watch a movie last night after dinner, but instead of making the three plus hour investment The Godfather requires, we picked the much shorter House Bunny. Really, I think Brandon was just happy to be done right at 9:30, in time for his Call of Duty duties.

On to the movie! I am a huge proponent of stupid funny. I don't take it lightly. Dodgeball is one of my very favorite movies of all time. So, I was pretty much down for this movie from moment one. Brandon, on the other hand, isn't really a big fan of the genre, but he thought it was well done for what it was. Anna Faris was so lovably adorable, as was the whole sorority of misfits. I have a weird thing for Rumer Willis - she's off and strange in a way that I find totally irresistible, so I was as pleased as I expected to be with her performance here. We both found the story to be pretty predictable, but we don't mind predictable when it's done in such a charming way. We also really liked the snappy pace - the movie doled out the lessons nice and quickly without pretending that anyone didn't see them coming, the montages and a-ha moments for the characters were constantly flowing. Fun little piece of fluff.

Brandon said he liked it but wouldn't recommend it; I liked it a lot and would absolutely recommend it because I don't think anyone would have overinflated expectations of some sort of cinematic masterpiece watching something like this. If you're in the mood for a cute, silly movie you won't be disappointed.

"She took a giant shit on my face. Literally."

(500) Days of Summer

What a great choice to kick off our movie watching extravaganza! This was a great little movie. I think when all is said and done, character pieces like this are probably our shared favorite genre. This one had some great visuals and a wonderful ensemble cast, including the adorable pre-Hit Girl, Chloë Grace Moretz. Anyone who knows Brandon at all probably won't be surprised that he yelled "I'm out!" during the [spoiler]fantasy dance sequence[/spoiler] but once he got past that we were fine. We were also quite distracted/delighted at times by the fact that Geoffrey Arend scored Christina Hendricks (a woman Brandon and I agree is probably as close to physical perfection as you will find on this planet) in real life, as we are every time we see him in anything.

Moving on to actual opinions about the movie. Brandon liked the tone and the world view. He said it felt a little stark but in a realistic way, and that he could sympathize with Tom. I related to the way it illustrated how easy it is to see what you want to see and hear what you want to hear when you love someone, especially when that person doesn't feel the same. Then we argued for about 10 minutes as to whether or not Summer was a bitch. Brandon concluded the argument with a smile, saying, "You're just as bad as she is." Fair enough.

Next up: The Godfather. However, we may have to push it off for a day as we are going out to dinner with some friends tonight. We might see if they want to come back to our place to watch a movie afterward, in which case The House Bunny or Feast will probably be better options!

Week One Schedule

Drum roll, please: The first week of movies has been selected! For some reason this was like pulling teeth, so I decided to take the bull by the horns and pick the second half. We both agreed on the first one, as previously mentioned, then Brandon threw down the Godfather gauntlet. Shamefully, neither of us has seen any of the trilogy, so this will be a strong start. Since he wouldn't man up and pick the final three for the first week, I jumped in and did it myself.

• (500) Days of Summer
• The Godfather
• The Godfather: Part II
• The Godfather: Part III
• Feast [I was one of the handful of Project Greenlight fans, so I have been wanting to see this one forever]
• The House Bunny [I have only heard good things about this movie, and I think this will be a good palate cleanser after the gore]
• Jesus Camp [the former Catholic school girl in me is quite intrigued by this documentary]

So, there you have it. The first week is locked and loaded. Brandon promises he will get the second week mapped out at lunch today. We'll see how that goes. I will have our reviews of (500) Days of Summer posted ASAP!